The objects in my house

The objects in my house

The objects in my house I love my house, i’ve been living here for four years and i still love it like when i first moved in. The objects in my house are what irritate me. Only some of them though. They all have their own personalities, which drives me crazy sometimes. Its like they know exactly what they want and don’t want. Bizarre, right ? Some of them try to co-operate with me but the others try to test me. Either way, I know what i’ll get from all of them. First, Let me tell you about the objects in my room.

There’s my wonderful bed. I love my bed the most. Say i came home from a hard day of work and school, my bed would be there to comfort me, it really would understand how tired i am. The silky, warm sheets and comforter are so warm and smell of home. as soon as i lay my head on the soft pillow, i dream on and on. I consider it my best friend because i always want us to be together. I believe that it has my best interest at heart and is looking out for me all of the time. Then there’s my alarm clock. It’s after me, i just know it.

It’s so jealous of my relationship with my bed that it’s always trying to tear us apart. So childlike. The thing plots against me all night and then get me every morning at about 5:15. It the worst object of them all. I’ ll talk about the plant in the corner of my room now. That darn plant is in cahoots with the alarm clock, it always makes this funny shape at night when i turn the light off so that it makes a weird shadow on the ceiling that scares me. Then when i turn the light on to check, it acts normal again. Sneaky.

Luckily i have my pretty pink lamp on my nightstand to turn on so i can keep an eye on it. Last but not least, it’s my tv. I think it plots against me too sometimes because it brings on all of the good shows as soon as i try to do my homework, always trying to distract me. Now let me tell you about my kitchen, if it was up to me, i’d get rid of kitchens all together because all of the objects in that room are evil and out to get me. Like for example, the other day i was baking a cake and i did everything right, i even put the timer on but when i took it out of the oven, it was BURNT !

How dare that oven intentionally burn my cake. It couldn’t have been my fault, i did everything right and the oven did that on purpose. I think my oven and toaster are also in cahoots because my toast always burns too. Next is my microwave, which hate me. No surprise there, it’s just my luck. Everytime i put leftover food in the microwave, yes, it eats up… Just enough to burn my tongue. I swear the microwave sits there and says ” i’m going to make this food so hot so that it hurts her mouth”.

Mission accomplished because i now have a sore tongue. The other thing that hates me is the dishwasher. Sure, what can a dishwasher do? How about not was my dishes properly so that i have to re-wash all of them by hand. I load my dishwasher every two days, and my dishes always come out with food stuck to them, then my mom makes me redo all of them. What a pain. That’s it for all of the evil things in my kitchen. Lets move on to the living room. There’s only one thing in that room that i like and that is the couch.

Its tan and leather. The couch is very comfortable, my body just sinks right into it when i sit down. Nice and relaxing. Its usually where i read my books because it’s really quiet. It’s sad to say, but there’s yet more things in my home that are plotting against me like my washing mashine and dryer. Both of them are too loud and disrupt me when i’m trying to concentrate. On top of all of that, my washing machine usually fades my clothes or dies them a different color and my dryer shrinks my clothes all of the time.

I think they try to ruin them because they’re jealous of how many clothes i have. Just like the relationship with my alarm clock and bed. Jealousy is the worst. There aren’t anymore evil objects in my house for me to tell you about but i’m pretty sure my mom is supposed to be redecorating soon so i’ ll probably be raging again really soon about which objects are out to get me. As for the ones already here, i might just lock them in the basement. Where they can’t get me anymore.

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